MAY 2nd IS SPECIAL

 MAY  2nd  Is  Special

May 2nd is special because it marks the day my husband, Rey, entered the pearly gates of heaven! Thoughts of more than four decades of marital union especially of the many happy times of our togetherness kept me from having my much-needed sleep. I decided to sit before my laptop and the result is the ff:

Dear Papa,

Today, May 2nd, my thoughts were centered on you since this is the 13th anniversary of your passing the threshold into God's warm embrace. While a part of me rejoiced over your well-deserved rest to enjoy the blessings of heaven, a greater portion of me languished over the grief and emptiness you left in my heart. The void has been irreplaceable and beyond cosmic repair through all these years! As a Christian, I have tried so many times to completely surrender to the will of God, in whatever comes my way. However, I have failed miserably, time after time, to do just that in regard to your passing - a loss which has been ingrained in my being. I must admit that for so long I have worn a mask of serene acceptance and total surrender before family, relatives and friends, alike. Only in times of my "alone-ness" have I shed off the mask of extreme grief and longing nestled in the bosom of my heart. After a while, moved by the futility of it all and the sin of not trusting in God, I would resolve to be a better Christian in this aspect of my life. Through the passing years, this interplay of conflicting emotions plagued me in almost sequential pattern. In every instance of its occurrence, I sought God's help only to be trapped within the tentacles of misery.

Then last Good Friday, in God's mysterious ways and in His own time, I felt the "peace beyond human understanding" envelop me as I let go of this dimension of my life - your passing away. I let go of the sadness that had lain moored in my heart for years. I was endowed with a wonderful feeling of peace that I believe could only come from the Holy Spirit! How true are the words of St. John Paul II when he said, "The Holy Spirit inspires, purifies and strengthens those noble longings by which we strive to make earthly life more human." 

Papa, you have been a loving and sincere husband, a solicitous father and grandfather, a responsible provider, a singer entertainer, a man with a green thumb, a jack-of-all-trades and most of all, a family chef, all rolled into one! What remarkable qualities few men can equal! In fact, the comments of relatives and friends who have witnessed your versatility attest to their admiration which sometimes had a tinge of envy. I know that I had many times expressed my appreciation and thanks to you but I feel that I have not adequately said nor done enough to drive home this fact more deeply. Therefore, here and now, I say, "Thank you so much for being the husband you had been to me and please forgive me for being less of the wife you would have wanted me to be."


 I dedicate these lines to you:

  To  My  Husband - REY

I celebrated the Liturgy of the Eucharist today
In your honor to Almighty God I prayed
"Thank you, Lord, for the life you have given me
Largely due to my husband you have sent from Thee."

To me, you personified the "man of all seasons" 
Truly because of a multitude of reasons
First and foremost was your love so sincere and true
Was untarnished in the years we've been through.

Like an invincible steel tower you stood upright
Against the wind of temptation, wayward sights
Empowered with a Faith which you had held strong
Since your childhood as an orphan struggling along.

"Common traits and interests are good," said a sage,
"to achieve maximum compatibility in marriage."
But God's sense of humor undefined such notion
He gave me a man of few words but one of action.

In your obscure, quiet and inimitable way
You put to naught and defiantly held at bay
Popular belief that a man with interest in many trades
Could not be a "master" of any chosen shade.

But you proved to all beyond a shadow of doubt
You excelled in carpentry, gardening, electric route
Car repair, in fact, a handyman through and through
And above all these, an excellent cook, too!

A "Thank you, Lord," will always be on my lips,
"For my husband, one of your magnanimous gifts."
 Our one-of-a-kind marriage lasted forty-seven years
All in all, gold-encrusted, despite occasional tears.

I know that now in your eternal home in heaven
You regale God with your songs sometimes shaken
With a plea that He guide and lead each one of us
To you, when "The End" comes to our earthly task.


I   LOVE   YOU,

Darling    ( to you )

March 13, 2016 Birthday Anniversary Reflections

                               Birthday  Anniversary  Reflections


                    Birthday anniversaries are opportune times to reflect on one's life - what has been and possibly, envisioning what is yet to come. Some people say it is not good to indulge in the past. "Forget
the past," they admonish. But I feel that it is an important phase in one's life to consider if one is to channel energies toward a better, happier and hopefully, a brighter future. While birthday anniversary reflections are especially necessary for the young who are endowed with greater stamina, wider field of action and the universally-accepted norm of much more time at their disposal to achieve goals, I still hold the idea that even those in their "twilight years" benefit from such deliberations once a birthday page is torn off the calendar.

          On the eve of my 85th birthday anniversary, I have done some of my own reflections. The series of flashbacks of my life from as far back as I can remember brought moments of joy and triumph intermingled with times of disappointment, helplessness and sorrow. But isn't that the tapestry of everyone's life?

          My introspection revealed two valuable insights:

          Firstly, that God gives His love and care to everyone, but especially to those who seek Him, stays close to Him, trusts and depends on Him and also "cooperates" with Him every time He opens doors of opportunity and growth. This aspect of cooperating with God is, perhaps, least understood by people who misconstrue
the Bible passage which says that God is our "Jehovah Jireh," our Provider. While our Lord provides for our needs - both basic for existence and also for pleasure and achievement, in His own time, it is imperative for us to accept and respond with dedication and effort. In all honesty, I can say that I exerted my level best every time an opportunity or challenge presented itself. In so doing, I believed that I have achieved the pinnacle of success I was capable of in my whole life - both in my family and in my career I had never dreamed of or dared to fantasize! 

          Secondly, that if I were to live my life all over again, I would not aspire to change anything. After all, I have been the recipient of  so much blessings from our Lord so that I can say with utmost conviction, " It has been a good life!  Thanks be to God! "


                           IN  RETROSPECT

A journey starts with the first step, so they say
Beneath those words lie an unmistakable tone
That the initial step is the hardest one to take
It takes "courage" to leave the comfort zone.

On the eve of my 85th anniversary year of birth
My thoughts flashed back to my San Francisco hearth
When on the seventh month, 22nd day in 1979
I came to settle in my second homeland berth.

Full of excitement and high hopes for a future bright
The tomorrow would bring to my children's sight
True, I hurdled heartaches which caused so much pain
Yet bubbled with glee at the thousand joys gained.

The years have taught me precious lessons to impart
To my children and my children's children all smart
First and foremost is to stay close to Jesus and Mary
To keep your Faith vibrant, persevering and holy.

 Know Jesus so as to keep your Faith strong
His Word you should read, meditate on and believe
Then being a Christian unfolds in the way you live
That every aspect of life, the Bible guides all along.

Another precious gem I learned from an ancient mind
Is that the secret of the universe is within you
Because what you give away comes back in kind
Seek love, give love and you will reap affection, too.

One's "word of honor" is always to be treasured
Which makes up your identity as "the" person
Be careful what you promise to do or not to measure
Your "word," a covenant to honor with pleasure.

My mother personified love and generosity
It was her second name friends teased incessantly
I learned wisdom from the example she wrought
Than from the lessons her lovely lips taught.

Our nightly devotion to the Family Rosary
Was as constant as the Angelus prayer key
"Padre Nuestro" and "Dios te Salve" I learned first
Before Our Father and Hail Mary in English verse.

My mother reminded us all since we were small
To practice the Golden Rule with every living soul
And live a life of "granite-like integrity."
So as to look at anyone in the eye with sincerity.

Her advice about marriage, you should all know
The fifty-fifty proposition is much too low
Marital bliss requires you give 70 percent no less
To enjoy happy, golden years of togetherness.

So I have tried to follow my mother's steps firm
To be a pulsating example of what I preach
I hope that by this time my loved ones affirm
The values I hold sacred to learn and to teach.

I have no regrets for all with God's grace I've done
Have accomplished much more than I have planned
My good Lord has decreed that I relish the thought
What I have achieved are what I have really sought.

Now on bended knees I reverently pray,
"Thank you, Lord, for your guidance along the way
Thank you for being in control of my life
Which has helped me through all the strife."

As I stand on the stage of my life this day
With open arms and wild enthusiasm I face
The future, new beginnings, even painful thorns
With God, I will conquer all till I greet my New Morn!